How to Overcome The Power Of The Scale

This post was originally published January 31, 2016. God has continued to bring deeper healing to my life in overcoming the power of the scale and I know there are other women who need to know it is possible to stop judging themselves by the number on that scale. The video is new.


"I can't see the scale. How much does she weigh?", the nurse loudly asked.

"$#&", he quickly responded.

Hearing that number felt like a dagger was thrust through my heart and it took every bit of self-control not to cry.  Why does a number on a scale have such power over me?

How can it make me feel like a complete failure or total success depending on what it says?

The Power of the Scale

I have to be honest and tell you going to the doctor stresses me out for one reason and one reason only...getting on the scale. I'm really serious about this. I wish I weren't, but since I was very young, my weight has been a big deal, to the point of believing it defines me.

The first time I remember questioning my own value and worth was on the playground in the third grade. A stupid boy called me "fat". His words cut through me and made me believe there was something very wrong with me. I became painfully aware of my body and my weight and how different I was. The truth is I had already started developing and my body was transitioning to a young woman when every other girl in my grade was still pencil thin. I was significantly taller and bigger than every other girl in our tiny school and I longed to be like them.

My gymnastics coached urged me to go on my first diet at age 10 or 11. The inexpensive uneven bars at our local YMCA only held 100 pounds (110 at the most), so they wouldn't safely hold my 120 pound frame. Rather than believe there was something wrong with the bars, I believed it was me. I wasn't good enough. I wasn't small enough.

These early messages imprinted my heart and mind with the belief that my worth, value, and significance were directly tied to the number on that scale. If it was too high, I was a failure and my worth plummetted. If it was low enough, I was a success. Truthfully, it was never low enough and I never believed I was valuable for just being me.

In the years following, I continued to be teased about my size which led to a detrimental cycle of yo-yo dieting.  This further solidified my belief that the number on the scale defined me.

The Day It All Changed

I left the doctors office as quickly as I possibly could barely making it to my car before bursting into tears. My heart was ripped wide open.

 

How could that nurse have done that? 

I'm going to email the office manager and complain. This was WRONG. 

My initial thoughts about the injustice of the situation quickly turned inward.

How could I let this happen again? 

How could I weight that much...again?  

I'm such a failure. 

The attacks were coming fast and hard through my sobbing. Then I felt His presence right beside me. He had been there all along. Even in the doctor's office.

He gently reminded me of my recent devotion. Up until this moment, I had NEVER told anyone about the power of the scale in my life. I have hidden this belief fiercely, so no one would see my weakness or the resulting coping method I would use to bury the pain.

The message of the devotion came rushing in through the whispers of the Holy Spirit...

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Oh friend, no matter what you are going through today. No matter the depth of the valley you are in or the height of the mountain you are on, He is there holding onto you.

He NEVER leaves.

He NEVER let's go.

There's NO place His love can't reach.

He is ALWAYS holding onto you.

You have to choose to hold onto Him.

What God Wants For You

I seriously contemplated contacting the doctor's office and complaining about what the nurse did, but ultimately decided not to. My reason?

God didn't cause that situation to happen to me, but He did allow it for a reason. He wanted to use it to see what I would choose.

Would I choose my old response of isolation, binging, and the negative spiral that always followed, OR would I choose to abide in Him, reach out to someone I trust, to lean into Him, and to trust He would rescue me.

I give Him all the glory for me choosing the second option.

God is crazy about you and wants to heal those deep hurts you may be hiding in the dark. Dear friend, I pray you will allow Him to uncover those wounds and whisper these words to you....

"Don't isolate. 

Lay your fear of failure down to me. 

You don't have to pretend you have it all together. 

Your "go-to" coping method will not solve this or take away your pain. 

Abide in Me. 

You can't rescue yourself.

Apart from Me you can do NOTHING. 

Lean into Me.

Pick up the phone and call someone."

Friend, I know the scale may not be an issue for you. Just remove that word from the sentence "The Power of the _______" and replace it with what you are using to define who you think you are. Choose to bring it from the darkness into the light and allow Jesus to heal, restore, and provide you the full and satisfying life. He is the ONLY one who can.

Since that day, I have meditated on Psalm 139:14 from The Message..... "Body and soul, I am marvelously made.

And dear friend, so are you! Exactly as you are!

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What is preventing you from inviting someone you trust into your struggle? 

Please drop a comment below and share your thoughts so we can all encourage each other.

For Freedom!

Emilie

P.S. Stay tuned for information on how you can join me and an amazing group of women on one transformational adventure very soon...The "NO-DIET" Diet Revolution.

Let me know what you think!

2 Comments

  • Cindy

    Reply Reply February 2, 2016

    Emily, you are precious!! I really love seeing your courage to step out and minister to us through the talent God has given to you!

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